WHAT THIS IS ALL ABOUT: Before I get to the meat of this post, I want to make sure you know what’s going on here. From some comments on other posts, I’ve noticed that some people don’t realize what this blog is all about. I want to make sure everyone who visits understands that the point of this blog is to get complete strangers to send me birthday gifts for my 30th birthday (Sept. 1st). All the details you need are here. So, now that you know, send me something! Oh, and spread the word, please.

Now, onto the post:

Just 5 more days until my big day! So, I give you the last Thursday Thirteen before my Birthday.

Also, feel free to take a look around while you’re here. And don’t forget the other My Fickle Mind Blogs

13 Things I Had Hoped To Have Accomplished By My 30th Birthday, But Haven’t

1. Become immortal
2. Take over the world, successfully, with an incredibly brilliant evil plan
3. Be named Supreme Queen of the World (may or may not be connected with #2)
4. Give birth to octuplets, naturally
5. Invent an awesome tech gadget that would change the world
6. Learn to speak Klingon - fluently
7. Become the first female MMA champ
8. Learn magic - actual Harry Potter-esque magic
9. Be on TV - as long as it wasn’t on Cops or Jerry Springer
10. Have a drag queen create a persona based on me
11. Turn a straight man gay
12. Meet Orlando Bloom. Have him fall in love with me at first sight. Have to break his heart and turn him down because I’m already happily married to my soul mate. Encourage him to allow Viggo Mortensen to comfort him. Have him realize that Viggo is his true love. Have Viggo and Orlando go to California to get married. Become famous to all LoTR fangirls because I got them together. 
13. Become a millionare by winning the lottery
    

WHAT THIS IS ALL ABOUT: Before I get to the meat of this post, I want to make sure you know what’s going on here. From some comments on other posts, I’ve noticed that some people don’t realize what this blog is all about. I want to make sure everyone who visits understands that the point of this blog is to get complete strangers to send me birthday gifts for my 30th birthday (Sept. 1st). All the details you need are here. So, now that you know, send me something! Oh, and spread the word, please.

Now, onto the post:

So, recently, I’ve been bombarded with questions as to why I’m doing this whole Birthday blog thing. Since I’m a helpful person, I’m going to give you all the answers to those questions.

Q: You have six other blogs under six other personalities, do I need to buy you a present for each personality?
A: Need, no. But feel free to buy as many gifts for as many personalities as you like. You can find more about each personality by going to their blogs. Go to My Fickle Mind and you’ll find links to all my personalities. If you have trouble choosing a personality to shop for, Fag Hag is a safe bet.

Q: I just realized that there are only 6 days until your birthday and I haven’t sent my gift yet. Even though it will probably be late, should I still send it?
A: Of course, you silly person! Late gifts are just as good as gifts on time. And I’ll try to find it in my heart to forgive your slight, this time.

Q: Why is the sky blue?
A: Because it brings out my eyes.

Q: What happens if I give you the same gift as someone else?
A: Then I have two. Is math hard for you?

Q: I’m an albino hermaphrodite, can I still send you a Birthday gift?
A: Of course. I don’t discriminate, especially when it comes to getting gifts.

Q: Your Birthday is on the same days as my child’s and I can’t afford two gifts, what should I do?
A: Teach your child about sacrifice by sending me a gift instead of getting one for your greedy child.

Q: I just found out I have herpes, what should I do?
A: Don’t give it to me - that is not a good Birthday gift.

UPDATE: This is the only acceptable type of herpes to give as a Birthday gift - From Think Geek’s collection of Plush Microbes:

Q: I don’t know you, why should I send you a Birthday gift?
A: Because I asked. Think of it as a random act of kindness. Or on my part, a random act of greed.

Q: If you could have anything for your Birthday, what would it be?
A: I’ve already mentioned this twice: Orlando Bloom with a bow tied around his….

Q: Do you believe in ghosts?
A: I don’t know, can they buy me Birthday gifts?

Q: Am I gay?
A: I don’t know. Do you like gay sex? ‘Cause that’s usually a big clue.

Q: Who’s going to win America’s Got Talent?
A: What am I, psychic? As a stab in the dark, I’m going to guess the cross dressing opera singer.

Q: Have you gotten any gifts yet?
A: Nope. But I’m waiting patiently. I know you people won’t disappoint me.

Q: I bought you a great gift but I have no wrapping paper. What should I wrap it in?
A: Cash. Preferably $100 bills.

Q: How old are you going to be?
A: This many (picture me holding up my middle finger). I’ve already mentioned it here: 30. The big 3-0.

Q: Are you crazy?
A: A little, yeah. But does that mean I’m not worthy of Birthday gifts? No it doesn’t.

WHAT THIS IS ALL ABOUT: Before I get to the meat of this post, I want to make sure you know what’s going on here. From some comments on other posts, I’ve noticed that some people don’t realize what this blog is all about. I want to make sure everyone who visits understands that the point of this blog is to get complete strangers to send me birthday gifts for my 30th birthday (Sept. 1st). All the details you need are here. So, now that you know, send me something! Oh, and spread the word, please.

Now, onto the post:

Good morning! On this early Wednesday morning, I give you this week’s Wednesday Weirdness.

Also, feel free to take a look around while you’re here. And don’t forget the other My Fickle Mind Blogs.

1. How often do you talk to your siblings?
Not as often as I should. We spend a lot of time exchanging email questionnaires and such. We talk when something important has happened, but other then that I’m very bad at keeping in touch.

2. How well do you deal when given an ultimatum?
I don’t think I’ve ever actually been given an ultimatum. Or if I had, I’ve probably blocked it out. I’m pretty sure I wouldn’t have dealt with it very well. Ultimatums don’t sound fun.

3. Have you ever dated someone or had a lover who had an emotional or mental disorder?
A diagnosed one, no. But I’m pretty sure all my past boyfriends were at least a little insane - they have to be to have dated me!

4. How do you feel about crossdressing?
I’m all for it. If that’s what makes you happy or comfortable or sexy or whatever, go for it. But if you’re a man embracing your inner girl, be conscious of the fact that some men make ugly women. So, get makeup tips. And shave.

5. Have you ever lied about the number of sexual partners you have had to someone? Why?
Nope.

6. Does your significant other have the same political and religious views that you do? How often do you discuss politics and religion with them?
Nope. We rarely talk politics or religion because it bores me.

7. What sport, if any, do you find to be most boring?
All of them. I hate sports - playing or watching.

8. Have you ever honestly peed in the pool?
I don’t think the pee was very honest, but yes, honestly, I’ve peed in a pool before. And I’ll probably do it again in my life. If I’m already in the pool and have to pee, I’m probably just going to let it rip. Sorry.

WHAT THIS IS ALL ABOUT: Before I get to the meat of this post, I want to make sure you know what’s going on here. From some comments on other posts, I’ve noticed that some people don’t realize what this blog is all about. I want to make sure everyone who visits understands that the point of this blog is to get complete strangers to send me birthday gifts for my 30th birthday (Sept. 1st). All the details you need are here. So, now that you know, send me something! Oh, and spread the word, please.

Now, onto the post:

Now, let’s skip forward to Wednesday so I can give you this week’s Hump Day Humor.

Also, feel free to take a look around while you’re here. And don’t forget the other My Fickle Mind Blogs.

This week’s theme: Cowboys. Now, in my twisted, Fag Hagy brain, cowboys = Brokeback Mountain. So, for this week, I give you Brokeback Mountain parodies!

Two warnings before we start. One, the following post is gay themed. If that’s not your cup of tea, go elsewhere. Two, the videos are from YouTube which can be quite temperamental. So, don’t be surprised if the video is no longer available.

First, Brokeback by the Bell. I admit I watched Saved by the Bell when I was much, much younger. This was way before I got into slash fan fiction and gay movies so I wasn’t viewing the world with rainbow tinted glasses just yet. I never saw the subtext between Zack and Slater before this video.

Second, we have Broke Trek. I have to say, that the editing is brilliant in this one. If this is how slash fans view the show, I can completely understand the massive amounts of Star Trek slash fan fiction available.

I was going to post more, but those are the two best I could find. And I don’t do mediocre when it comes to gayness.

WHAT THIS IS ALL ABOUT: Before I get to the meat of this post, I want to make sure you know what’s going on here. From some comments on other posts, I’ve noticed that some people don’t realize what this blog is all about. I want to make sure everyone who visits understands that the point of this blog is to get complete strangers to send me birthday gifts for my 30th birthday (Sept. 1st). All the details you need are here. So, now that you know, send me something! Oh, and spread the word, please.

Now, onto the post:

It’s Tuesday. You know what that means - a meme! Here’s this week’s TMI Tuesday.

Also, feel free to take a look around while you’re here. And don’t forget the other My Fickle Mind Blogs.

You find a fairy. With a wave of their wand they can change anything for you.
I already have a fairy in my life - he’s just not magic.

What is the one thing you would change about your body?
Not a physical trait because any of them that I want to change I need to do myself, not by magic, otherwise the change isn’t going to mean anything. But I’d ask the fairy to take away the pain. It’s nothing horrible or life threatening, I just seem to very easily pull muscles and easily bruise my delicate skin. It would be lovely to go a day without having to pop advil for one pain or another.

What is the one personality trait you would change?
Is stress a personality trait? Oh wait, it is with me. That’s the one I would have changed. I’d love to not be so stressed about the tiniest things. Maybe I could enjoy life that way.

What is the one thing about your job you would change?
Job, what job? Maybe the fairy could give me one - maybe I could get paid for reading slash fan fiction or watching reality TV - the things I do best.

What is the one thing about your home you would change?
Soundproof it. We own our place but it’s a condo attached to other people’s condos and we can still hear them. Not as bad as at our old apartment but I would love silence.

What is the one thing about your Significant Other you would change?
Not a thing, he’s perfect just the way he is. Well, maybe I’d have the fairy turn him into chocolate - self healing chocolate. Mmm…delicious everlasting chocolate hubby….

Who is the one person you would poof out of your life and why?
Poof as in kill or poof as in transport to Timbuktu? I’m going to assume the latter cause killing is bad, even magic killing. And actually, I don’t have anyone I need to poof out of my life right now, but thanks for asking.

Who is the one person you would poof back in and why?
Poof as in bring back from the dead or poof as in transport magically from far away? I’m going to answer based on both. Poof as in back from the dead would be my hubby’s grandpa. I didn’t get much of a chance to get to know him before he died and I know his wife misses him. Poof as in transport magically would be my sister in law, AM. And I’d hope she’d grab onto my nephews and brother before she was poofed. The why is because I miss them. Could someone invent the poof technology, please? That would be awesome.

WHAT THIS IS ALL ABOUT: Before I get to the meat of this post, I want to make sure you know what’s going on here. From some comments on other posts, I’ve noticed that some people don’t realize what this blog is all about. I want to make sure everyone who visits understands that the point of this blog is to get complete strangers to send me birthday gifts for my 30th birthday (Sept. 1st). All the details you need are here. So, now that you know, send me something! Oh, and spread the word, please.

Now, onto the post:

Okay people, in exactly a week, I turn 30. So, where are my gifts? Over a month I’ve been maintaining this blog and giving you all lots of info on what I want for gifts - I’m real helpful that way - and still my mailbox is empty. Why? I don’t understand how anyone could refuse sweet little me free gifts. No, really, how could you?

Maybe I should give you all the benefit of the doubt: I bet you all just wanted to wait until today to start buying my gifts so that they’d arrive right on my birthday. That way I wouldn’t be tortured by boxes I couldn’t open right away. Yeah, that’s got to be it. I’m sorry I doubted you. Please go back to your gift shopping.

There are probably also some people who have never been to this blog before and don’t understand what’s going on. I’m sure as soon as you read the Welcome, Intro and Details you’ll want to hop on the gift buying bandwagon. So, go hop.

I mean, you really don’t have any excuse not to buy the nice stranger a birthday gift for her 30th birthday. If you think you do, I want to hear it so I can tell you how wrong you are.

And since there are only seven days until my big day, I’m going to be kind and except late gifts. So, get shopping people! Only seven days left, times a wasting!

WHAT THIS IS ALL ABOUT: Before I get to the meat of this post, I want to make sure you know what’s going on here. From some comments on other posts, I’ve noticed that some people don’t realize what this blog is all about. I want to make sure everyone who visits understands that the point of this blog is to get complete strangers to send me birthday gifts for my 30th birthday (Sept. 1st). All the details you need are here. So, now that you know, send me something! Oh, and spread the word, please.

Now, onto the post:

We’re going to go with three memes this lovely Monday morning. Here’s this week’s Manic Monday.

Also, feel free to take a look around while you’re here. And don’t forget the other My Fickle Mind Blogs.

1) If you could take more control of one aspect of your life, what would it be?
Just one? How about how I feel about things? I so easily get stressed and feel guilty about the tiniest things. I over analyze everything I say and do. I don’t have time to enjoy thing or be happy. I wish I had more control over my emotions.

2) If you were to name the difference between the male soul and the female soul, what would it be?
One has a penis one has a vagina. Er, I mean a spiritual penis and a spiritual vagina, of course.

3) If you had to admit the most selfish thing you do on a regular basis, what would you say it is?
Me selfish? Never. Okay maybe sometimes. The most selfish thing I do is probably putting myself first. Yep. I figure out what I want to do, eat or watch before considering other people. How selfish is that.

WHAT THIS IS ALL ABOUT: Before I get to the meat of this post, I want to make sure you know what’s going on here. From some comments on other posts, I’ve noticed that some people don’t realize what this blog is all about. I want to make sure everyone who visits understands that the point of this blog is to get complete strangers to send me birthday gifts for my 30th birthday (Sept. 1st). All the details you need are here. So, now that you know, send me something! Oh, and spread the word, please.

Now, onto the post:

Monday meme number two: Curious as a Cat.

Also, feel free to take a look around while you’re here. And don’t forget the other My Fickle Mind Blogs.

1) What is the hardest secret you’ve ever had to keep?
Well, now if I told you that, I wouldn’t be keeping the secret, now would I? And that would mean it wasn’t a very hard secret to keep. The hardest secrets to keep are hard because you can’t share it with anyone, even the internet.

2) If your soul were to be represented by a color, what color would it be?
Black. Dark and bitter just like I like my coffee. Just ask Queen of Darkness.

3) Define the word “hypocrite.”
Someone who says one thing, like being gay is a sin, and then does something, like being caught having gay sex, that goes against that statement.

4) If you had to trade closets with someone you know, whose wardrobe would you like to have? (assume the clothes would magically fit)
Hmm…don’t know many people. Going to go with my sister in law’s closet because if they magically fit, it would mean I was skinny and tall and gorgeous like her!

5) Show and Tell. What comes to mind first when you see this picture? Or, tell a story if it reminds you of one.

Someone needs more stuff in their front yard. I dream of a day when my front yard will be full of statues and figurines and a mosaic toilet fountain.

WHAT THIS IS ALL ABOUT: Before I get to the meat of this post, I want to make sure you know what’s going on here. From some comments on other posts, I’ve noticed that some people don’t realize what this blog is all about. I want to make sure everyone who visits understands that the point of this blog is to get complete strangers to send me birthday gifts for my 30th birthday (Sept. 1st). All the details you need are here. So, now that you know, send me something! Oh, and spread the word, please.

Now, onto the post:

Monday’s a bitch and so am I. So, here’s this week’s meme: Monday’s a Bitch.

Also, feel free to take a look around while you’re here. And don’t forget the other My Fickle Mind Blogs.

1. When was the last time you were sick?
Actually, today. I don’t actually have a bug, well other then being a woman, but it certainly makes me feel sick. I actually don’t remember the last time I was sick-sick. I get a lot of sinus headaches and allergy stuffiness, especially this time of year, and that always makes me feel sick. But I’ve been taking Airborne anytime I feel an twinge of a head cold coming on and that seems to nip those in the bud.

2. Do you make an effort to try to avoid germs in places like public washrooms?
I make sure to wash my hands and make sure the toilet seat isn’t dirty before I sit but I don’t go beyond that. I feel pretty safe as long as I don’t lick anything.

3. What’s the longest time you’ve been away from work/school due to illness?
Since I haven’t worked in years, we’re going to go with school for this one. In high school, I missed two weeks of school because I was backed up. Of course, my friends just thought I was really sick, I wasn’t going to share the real reason with them.

4. What’s your favorite comfort food for when you’re not feeling well?
Depends on why I’m not feeling well. For days like today, it’s chocolate and salty foods. When I’ve got a cold/flu, it’s usually soup - you know the standard feel better food.

5. Are there any foods that you can’t eat anymore, due to past experience with food poisoning?
It’s not really a can’t eat, it’s a won’t eat: tuna sandwiches from subway. They’re the only thing that ever gave me food poisoning. I still remember seeing the tuna in the sink after I threw it up. My stomach was majorly wonky for weeks after that - had to eat really bland food which sucked because I worked at KFC at the time and couldn’t eat the really good stuff for lunch.

WHAT THIS IS ALL ABOUT: Before I get to the meat of this post, I want to make sure you know what’s going on here. From some comments on other posts, I’ve noticed that some people don’t realize what this blog is all about. I want to make sure everyone who visits understands that the point of this blog is to get complete strangers to send me birthday gifts for my 30th birthday (Sept. 1st). All the details you need are here. So, now that you know, send me something! Oh, and spread the word, please.

Now, onto the post:

Let’s go with three memes for this Friday, mmmkay? Here’s this week’s Food 4 Thought Friday.

Also, feel free to take a look around while you’re here. And don’t forget the other My Fickle Mind Blogs.

Breakfast
Are you a morning person or a night person?
More often then not, I’m a night person. Why? Because I tend to be nocturnal. For example, I woke up at 9pm today. I don’t like being nocturnal. I get stressed because I don’t get stuff done that is time sensitive and I feel cooped up in the house cause I’m usually just waking up when hubby gets home and he’s too tired to do anything. I’m going to have to stay up for about 24 hours and then sleep for like 12 hours to get on a normal scheduale.

Lunch
Do you like to shop? If yes, for what? Alone or with others?
Sometimes. If we have spending money, yes. If we’re broke, I stress about everything we purchase - even groceries. I like shopping with hubby. Unless it’s beads or craft supplies cause he gets bored.

Dinner
What is something that really motivates you?
Not much. I’m a lazy, procrastinator. Mostly, I get stuff done right before it’s due or after it starts to smell.

Midnight Snack
What is one thing you look forward to each day?
My cup(s) of coffee. Oh, and seeing my hubby, especially if he’s got coffee.

Recipe for this Week (instead of your recipe for life - what is it for just this week?)
One cup creativity, one cup humor, three cups of love. Stir and serve cold. With coffee.